Bertram: What’s your name?
Aphrodite: Depends on whom you ask.
Bertram: I’m asking you.
Aphrodite: I am Aphrodite, Goddess of love.
Bertram: What would others call you?
Aphrodite: Sherry called me Star, thinking she could just make up a name for me.
Bertram: Why didn’t you tell her your name was Aphrodite?
Aphrodite: When I tried to talk, she couldn’t hear me. It was very frustrating.
Bertram: She couldn’t hear you? You were quiet?
Aphrodite: Idiot, no! She physically couldn’t hear me. The words were coming out of my mouth and she looked at me as if it was my problem?
Bertram: Okay you rude goddess, what is your role in Sherry’s story?
Aphrodite: If I still had my powers, you’d be a frog right now. I, of course, had to fix her little love life. How was I supposed to know she was his true love?
Bertram: Sherry was whose true love?
Aphrodite: Lysander’s, of course. The Eros family line. Don’t you understand anything?
Bertram: I understand that talking to you is like talking to a stubborn mule. Let’s take this one step at a time. Who is Lysander?
Aphrodite: Lysander was the last male born to the Eros family line.
Bertram: Good, now we are getting somewhere. So, you made a love match of Sherry and Lysander since you are the goddess of Love?
Aphrodite: Not me! They did that all on their own. Well, he did that from Hades. I took away the love of Eros, God of Love, and kind of cursed the family and well…I don’t want to talk about that.
Bertram: Well, please sit down and stop pacing around the room. We can talk about something else.
Aphrodite: Fine! I wouldn’t even be here if it wasn’t for Sherry, the insufferable twit.
Bertram: So what did you do to the Eros family?
Aphrodite: You said we wouldn’t talk about that.
Bertram: I didn’t know the Goddess of Love could shoot flames from her eyes. So, what would you like to talk about?
Aphrodite: I thought I was here to talk about me, not them!
Bertram: If you don’t want to talk about their love life, how about yours?
Aphrodite: I have no love life since Eros put me in that stupid box. He really is a hot head you know.
Bertram: You’re calling him a hothead? I mean, so… why did he put you in a box?
Aphrodite: I said I don’t want to discuss that. I’m done.
Bertram: Where did she go? She just disappeared. Well, I guess this interview is over. Note to self: remove Sherry Duncan and Suzette Vaughn off my Christmas list for this.
Eros: Thank Zeus she’s gone, Miss…Miss, please snap out of it.
Bertram: Oh my, it’s warm in here. I’m feeling a little dizzy.
Eros: I get that all of the time. You’ll be fine in a moment.
Bertram: You promise? I’d like to know how you’re going to make it fine?
Eros: Stay on task now Miss…you were asking about Sherry and Xander?
Bertram: Ohh yes, those people. Okay, Sherry and Lysander, but first, please tell me your name? You look like a god.
Eros: I am a god. You want an interview do you not?
Bertram: Interview? I can think of better things to do with our time together. Sorry. You’re a little distracting. Was that your girlfriend that just poofed out of here?
Eros: My ex by about three millennia.
Bertram: So you’re single?
Eros: Yes my dear, I am, but we are not here for me, are we?
Bertram: We can be.
Eros: I am getting nowhere here.
Bertram: You could be.
Eros: Now listen here. I came to talk to you, not for you to be looking at me like that.
Bertram: How could you love that vicious Goddess? Sorry, I mean, how did she get out of the box? And is there a way we can put her back in… forever?
Eros: I could put her back but she is serving a new purpose. Xander let her out, he figured out the riddle to the box, so he was the one to break the curse.
Bertram: So that’s where Sherry comes in? She had to put her back?
Eros: Well the way it was supposed to go, Aphrodite was to find Sherry and lead her to Xander. But there were… complications, and well…Xander ended up in Hades.
Bertram: Aphrodite sent him there didn’t she, that bit.. er.. bites. That bites.
Eros: Well in a way, yes, and then it was up to Sherry to bring him back
Bertram: How did Sherry get him out?
Eros: She had to figure out how to open the box herself.
Bertram: Did she shove Aphrodite in it when she got it open?
Eros: No, she got her second chance with Xander, which we all should know, second chances at love don’t always happen, and still the story didn’t end there. For once Aphrodite was smart and stayed far away.
Bertram: Anything else you want to tell me, perhaps over dinner?
Eros: And drinks. Have you ever seen Mount Olympus in the fall?