Bertram: I am pleased to make your acquaintance, Mr. Forain, I think. You claim to be a vampire?
Henri: It is my pleasure to make your acquaintance as well, and feel free to refer to me as Henri. As for my claims, I make none. I am a vampire.
Bertram: Do you really expect me to believe that? Isn’t it more probable that you are suffering from delusions?
Henri: I realise the concept is difficult to comprehend for those with diminutive minds, but that does not make me delusional. Your inability to accept does not alter the truth.
Bertram: What is the truth?
Henri: How many times must I repeat myself? I am a centuries old vampire!
Bertram: When did you become, ahem, a vampire?
Henri: I was born in France, in the year 1527. I have been a vampire since the year 1557.
Bertram: How did you become a Vampire?
Henri: I came from a reasonably well-to-do family, two parents, two brothers; we were wine merchants in the Bordeaux region. I became a vampire when I met a woman; she made me a very seductive offer and I have never regretted anything. I consider choosing to be a vampire the true moment my existence began.
Bertram: Interesting. How do you justify this existence? Don’t you have to kill to feed?
Henri: Of course I kill, that is part of the pleasure. But, many men kill; at least I have better reasons.
Bertram: What has been the worst thing that you have done to another person?
Henri: I truly do not believe your readers wish to hear such terrors. I am quite fond of playing with my food. Repeatedly, and intensely.
Bertram: Oh. Perhaps we better avoid that subject. Have you ever harmed someone you loved? Have you loved?
Henri: Yes, I loved the woman I spoke of, the sweet one who brought me to my destiny. And yes, I’ve harmed her; we have delightfully harmed each other quite often.
Bertram: Ah, yes, well; perhaps on to the next subject. What is your religious view of things?
Henri: I have no quarrel with religion, though I hold no beliefs myself. When one lives through the conflicts caused by religious differences, you cease to put faith in doctrine.
Bertram: What about other aspects of faith? For instance, do you think redemption is possible?
Henri: I have no idea. I have no interest in it.
Bertram: What do you believe is your responsibility to the world?
Henri: My responsibility is to myself, the world is capable of destroying itself adequately without my aid.
Bertram: What is the most frightening potential deformity or defacement you can conceive of? What makes it so frightening?
Henri: Being mortal. It is weakness, my existence is far superior.
Bertram: I never had any desire for immortality. But each to his own, I suppose.
Henri: I must be off about my business. If you wish to know more about me, you can find me at Squidoo, whatever that is.